I feel the Cowboys Pain

As the clock ran down on the final seconds of the Cowboys game yesterday they showed Jerry Jones. I knew exactly what he was feeling. There is no worse feeling in sports than losing a season ending playoff game. It hurts.

It hurts so much because you know how much pain that the players, coaches, staff and every fan of the team are going through and there is nothing you can do about it. It hurts because you know how deflated everyone around you is and will be.

It hurts because you know the media is going to bother you and everyone around you that you care about with assinine questions and commentary and there is nothing you can or should do about it. The competitive spirit inside of you wants to lash out and try to beat some common sense into them, but you know there is no point.

You know that you are going to have to go through the drill of being calm so that everyone else is calm. Shutting out everything blasting at you when you leave your house or office, recognizing that its just noise that doesn’t change all the work everyone around you has put in to get this far. It doesnt change all that they have accomplished.

You know that the difference between winning and losing at this level is a very, very fine line. You will relive every moment that changed the outcome a thousand times over the next weeks. All the what ifs.

Then there comes a point where a smile comes on your face. You think of all the joy and fun of the season. The moments you would never ever trade. The knowledge that your team and organization has reached a level where the stakes are much higher. You take pride and satisfaction in where you are, knowing that its a foundation.

Then the competitive juices kick back in and you go to work. Looking for that edge. Wishing that next season was now.

50 thoughts on “I feel the Cowboys Pain

  1. We had the best season in a decade and set numerous team records. I am proud of the accomplishments of my team. Most of our players had never been to the playoffs. Essentially, we have a rookie quarterback who had an amazing year. We will be back.
    No worries.
    I wonder if Jerry Jones and Mark Cuban discuss handling this type of issue. Both have had great successes and come very close to the Big game in their respective sports.

    Comment by mark -

  2. yeah, way to go Mark!! sometimes this things had to happen in preparation for the future..Who knows? Mavs and Cowboys are great!!

    Comment by charl_arah -

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    Comment by yan -

  4. wow a great post mark…
    keep on posting ok..
    i think cowboys is a hard game..

    Comment by Lisa Marie -

  5. I know how you feel. The past 2 football seasons my parents alma matter has made it to the state championship in football and lost. If Texas hadn\’t won their championship in football.

    So I have been through the pain of 2 Mavericks losses, 2 state championships, 2 cowboys, stars, texas losing to a&m. Hopefully one of my teams can get another one soon(going for that big game in june).

    Screw boston sports fans!

    Comment by Bob -

  6. It will seems to me at them new games in which they will prove from the best sports party.

    Comment by Ten -

  7. I honestly am just proud with how well they played the whole season. I didn\’t expect them to do as well as they did and they showed everyone what they are capable of. I think we got a good glimpse of what America\’s football team can and will do in the coming years. The worst part of all it is honestly losing to the NY Giants…who the hell wants that on their shoulders? I am ready for the superbowl to be over and to shift our eyes on watching this NBA season unfold. Keep em Mav boys rollin…

    Comment by David Ogle -

  8. It really hurts to get knocked out like that, but I\’m really looking foreword to next season there\’s so much prospect in the team.

    Comment by Kim -

  9. Personally, I like reading your blog, I love insight into the world of successful people and how they see it. As a sports fan, I\’m die hard Philadelphia and feel no remorse for the cowboys.

    I could care less that Tony Romo went on vacation during his time off. It\’s not a big deal to me. It only became and issue because made it an issue which put pressure on everyone to make it a non-issue. It\’s football season Tony, wait 3 more weeks and go take a month of in Cabo, just don\’t do it with the world watching your every move during the playoffs

    Comment by Noah -

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    Make a stop at my blog, if you wish. Ciao.

    Comment by gian -

  11. Just saw you on Tv here in NZ…….TONITE!Very sorry about the loss MarK. WE had our own loss in NZ (New Zealand) this last year with regard to the All Blacks….and oh how a mighty loss that waas!!!!ANYWAY ….have a looky at my website! Might be of interest to YOU!! http://www.artdziner.co.nz Hope things go better for the season.

    Cheers and cheerio
    Monika Welch

    Comment by Monika Welch -

  12. The Cowgirls are at it again :P lol. There are plenty of glaring weaknesses on this team: the wuss for a head coach they have(his 0-4 record in the postseason tells the story), the wide receiver position(outside of the crybaby Terrell Owens.. boy, that press conference was hilarious!), absolutely terrible defensive backs(you can\’t win if you don\’t have cover guys), and that inconsistent QB Romo(as a Packer fan, I take great insult when this dummy is compared to Favre… win three MVPs and a Super Bowl ring, and then we\’ll talk).

    Go Pack Go!

    Comment by Mike Ochoa -

  13. Oh, please. Try following Philly sports teams, and then we\’ll talk about pain. Amateur.

    Comment by Mark -

  14. Well, it can\’t be any worse then being a lions fan and not even having a chance to go to the playoffs year in and year out. No offense or degrading to how you or Jones felt, but compared to where my beloved Detroit Lions have been the last 50 years, I would WISH for that pain.

    Comment by Eric J. Wilson -

  15. Yes that was a bit down watching that. Let us see if the Patriots can pull one out for us this year. The only reason I am pulling for the patriots is to remember the people who fought for this country.

    Comment by John -

  16. Very nice post mark. Quite heartfelt and I would bet that if Jerry Jones reads it, he would appreciate it.

    Nice go.

    Comment by danny -

  17. You take that competitive \”gene\” for granted. You shouldn\’t do that. In fact, you should be grateful for it. It\’s a gift.

    Trust me when I say there are those of us that want to throw up when we accidently let ourselves down. The though of losing in front of so many people keeps us from trying, especially because we know we never actually stand a chance, because we don\’t have the gift.

    Comment by Miss Ann Thrope -

  18. I just love the Dallas Cowboys and the loss was very painful for the division Champs and the fans. Maybe next year!

    Comment by Laura -

  19. The NFL playoff games have been suspenseful cliffhangers down to the last minute. I have never been an Eli Manning fan and always considered him overrated in large benefit to his family linage. But I am glad that it looks like Eli is finally getting it together and may show some real return on the New York Giants investment in him. Before the Indianapolis Colts lost I started to wonder if there would be a much hyped face off in the Super Bowl between Eli and Peyton reminiscent of the sibling rivalry and competition between Venus and Serena when they were ranked 1 and 2.

    Blaming Jessica for the Dallas Cowboys lost is just another facet of the current media obsession and belief that the world revolves around Jessica, Britney, Lindsay, Paris, and Nicole.

    Comment by Barbara -

  20. I am not a fan of the Cowboys, however, as a lifelong Bills fan I know the pain of losing! It really hurts. You are totally right about blocking out the negative and looking to the future for the next great win. Just remember it\’s not all about the win, but the FUN in the game!
    Very well stated Mark

    Comment by Jennifer -

  21. As a Psychologist, I have put behavioral and brain science to work from my early days of working street corners and courtrooms (not as woman of night but working with abused kids and juvenile offenders) and, since the early 90s, with fierce competitors on the wide worlds of sports- and business, politics, medicine and everywhere that people toil to make a life and a living.

    In every case, I taught people how to engage with the challenge- how to get \’in the zone\’ where connecting is the key to winning. In some instances, ordinary people like us were hit by the curve balls that life hurls- life-threatening illness and injury. Engaging with a full heart and a vision of success was critical to prevail and win.

    One of the critical pieces to winning is playing-to-win versus playing-not-to-lose. When we play-to-win, we do our best. When we play-not-to-lose, we never do our best- even when we win!

    When we play to win, whether we win or not, we are able to recover from any downer of not winning- to pull ourselves up and to walk with pride off of the court or field- or out of the treatment room where we work to heal. It is that sensation of having pushed beyond our own beliefs that is essential to a speedy recovery from setbacks, losses and those pesky curve balls that can blindside and sideline us.

    The smile comes when we realize, too, that it\’s all just a game- the game of life where perception is reality and- lucky for us- we get to choose the lens of rose or blue, half-full or half-empty.

    Comment by Pam Brill -

  22. I\’m not even much of a football fan but I was glued to the tube, so to speak. I also felt for the Cowboys and enjoyed reading Marks comments. Hey, now that you are quieter this year I still think of you more and look for you. Good luck in your team\’s goal this year. You take it like a man and I admire that.

    Comment by Bertie -

  23. Romo has better years ahead of him than a lot of other players in the league. 2010 will be his time. The Giants came off almost beating the Patriots playing their hearts out and kept that intensity for this game. Plus I bet Eli said to Payton one of us has to make it to the next round!

    They need to make some adjustments in their lineup, get more ball control. Add a second or better RB, frankly barber is ok, but he\’s the speed guy you want in after your main back. They need a second TE with hands to open things up a bit, and a short quick reciever/return guy: Eric Metcalf/Dave Meggett esque. The offense is too traditional the way it is they have no sparkplugs. No Jason Terry.

    Comment by nick -

  24. To feel sympathy for Jerry Jones is akin to calling Michael Irvin a pillar of society.

    Maybe next time Jerry Jones won\’t be handing out tickets to his players until AFTER his team has advanced.

    And maybe next year you frontrunning Cowbag fans will wait until AFTER the game to do your trash-talking on opposing teams\’ blogs. You deserve every bit of misery you get from that loss.

    How \’bout dem G-men!

    Comment by t-dips -

  25. I must say it is great to see the cowboys back in the playoffs.I am a redskins fan.We all go though the same pain for our teams,when we dont win!As the news said tony romo was in mexico partying and ely manning was studying….. hey ely had his game on…. The best team wins.

    Comment by capt. kirk -

  26. Hey Mark,It\’s never a good feeling to lose but to lose by the lump, thats the worse feeling. I\’ve been there and the worse thing you can do is deny you took the lump because it happens again.When I saw that wounded duck he threw over T.O.\’s head, I realized that the lump had started and when he threw that last pass at the end zone where a sharp shooter from a swat team wouldnt have taken a clear shot I knew it. Everybody goes through it. Thats the trick, from joe schmoe to the pros. You go THROUGH it and get over it. Thanks for the thoughts.

    Comment by Frankie from Lawnside -

  27. Before the cowboys game, I checked the qb stats on nfl.com and the quarterbacks with the highest ratings all won their games. The ones with lower ones all lost.

    Before you say \”duh….\”, this goes to show that a team needs their leader/quarterback to go out and play a great game.

    Romo didn\’t. Last season Bill Parcells told the media to put away the anointing oil when everyone was going gaga over Romo.
    He\’s got a chip on his shoulder that needs to be taken down a notch. Seems to me that he needs to grow up and mature before the Cowboys will have a chance to win any conference title or better.

    On another note, Bill Belichek over in New England is known to point out every flaw from the previous win for every player on the Patriots. Wade Philips is a happy go lucky guy who wants to enjoy his latest chance at being a head coach. I don\’t think I need to point out who is the more successful coach.

    Last point. Jessica Simpson is on the way down in her career – not up. Sure this is Romo\’s deal and not hers, but the point is, if you want to be successful – surround yourself with people going in the same direction as yourself.

    You want to go up, hang with people going up. You want to go down, hang around with has-beens – it works every time.

    Comment by Len -

  28. Thanks for the post, Mark!! I was sick of all the Cowboy bashing and second-guessing that occurred all last week. It couldn\’t have helped our mental game. I was at the game, and I loved every minute until those last few seconds. I\’m still proud to be a Cowboys fan and a Mavs fans, and I\’ll still wear my Romo jersey proudly.

    Comment by Carol -

  29. Yeah that was a crazy game and I can\’t believe the Giants pulled it off. I don\’t think anybody has a chance to beat the Patriots though since the Colts lost.

    Comment by Knee Walker -

  30. You can\’t place the blame on one player, say for example, an offensive lineman or receiver. But you can point out SEVERAL (read more than 5) glaring mistakes by Romo that costs the Cowboys the game. Not hustle mistakes either, but mental mistakes that indicate that he\’s not completely comfortable in the situation. Is it because he\’s young and inexperienced? Is it because he crumbles under pressure when the season heats up at the end? Both probably, but it is undeniable that he is not the same player at the end of the season that he is at the beginning. When was the last time you saw the famous Romo smile on the sideline? November? Doesn\’t that tell you a lot right there?

    Now, maybe he grows as a person and a player as he gets older and more experienced as a qb, but to say it\’s not his fault is just not accurate. Granted, it\’s not entirely his fault, but it is largely his fault. Not simply because he\’s the qb, but because of his poor decisions and poor execution in the clutch.

    Comment by John -

  31. or better yet, ask floyd. Being from GR, MI & witnessing him grow up. He\’s simply better because he hungrier and prepares better than anyone.

    Comment by Darryl -

  32. Man, that game DID hurt to watch. I feel better about my Cowboys now, but it definitely hurt to see those painful close ups of Jones and T.O. post-game and during press conferences–especially since I put money down on them to win the Super Bowl last time I was in Vegas. Ouch.

    They can only get better for next year though.

    Comment by Jacob -

  33. It is too bad that some fans will turn so quickly on the team and players that worked so hard to have an excellent season. As a fan enjoy the ups and come on, stick with your team through the downs. Knowing their pain, I think the worst part is that they have to wait so long to lace up their shoes to get the bad taste out of their mouth. Like the Mavs, the Cowboys will bounce back. Go Mavs! By the way, someone beat the Pats.

    Comment by Trevor Hiel -

  34. Well, this is a very young cowboy team, and their future is still way ahead of them. What makes a greatest winner, is one that has lost a few battles. They are learning before that big bang in their careers. Go Cowboys! and Go Mavs!

    Comment by Mitchell -

  35. i felt for the cowboys too. i heard mention of all the things T.O. had to do to make sure he was healthy enough to play. his obvious dedication and zeal for professional excellence is admirable – as it is the same zeal and vigor that the whole team bought to bear. I guess it can be harrowing to think that you did everything you could and for this one instance it was not enough.

    but the solace is – that you did all you could. your effort is all you control – and if you go balls out then you can never feel shame.

    Comment by blyx -

  36. I agree with Matt… blaming 1 player on a loss is pretty ridiculous and shows how \’true\’ some fans really are when they don\’t get their way.

    If they had less injuries – they could have won… if some of those missed catches were caught – they could have won… if some of the play calls by the coaches were a little better – they could have won.

    The last time I checked – Football was not a 1 man sport. Stop placing blame on 1 player just because you\’re jealous that he\’s banging a hot chick.

    Keep it real…

    Comment by Clint Lenard -

  37. Great post Mark. Thats the nature of sports, in the end only one team stands tall.

    But as time past, and you look back, you will appreciate the other things your team has accomplished. (For example, the Mavs reaching its first finals, increasing their winning percentage, reaching the playoffs every year, etc.)

    Comment by Will -

  38. I am so sports sad right now. Why do these 2 clubs show so much promise and fall so far short???!! WHY!!!??

    Comment by Jay -

  39. I don\’t think the cowboys loss can be blamed on Tony Romo and to call him a \”choker\” is entirely unfair. Romo can accurately make a claim as one of the few elite QBs in the league and has done so in an extremely short amount of time.

    There were a number of potentially big pass plays that were dropped by receivers , bonehead penalties, and a fatigued offensive line that all aided in the loss. Placing all the blame on Romo, Wade Phillips, or even Jessica Simpson is unwarranted and dumb.

    It\’s good to see also T.O. passionately defending his quarterback and there isn\’t a doubt in my mind that the cowboys will be a force in the NFC East again next year.

    Comment by Matt Wills -

  40. romo flops every year with about 4 games left… he gets to hollywood, starts screwing hot celebs and cant handle the preasure… hey romo…. become a homo or something… keep the damn pecker in your pants… play football and learn you ain\’t got it at the end….. it takes a real man to handle the heat when the chips are in the middle of the table… CHOKER!!!

    Comment by charles peeler -

  41. I couldn\’t believe they lost yesterday, to be honest. I knew the Giants had grown to be a tougher team over the past few weeks, but never expected them to pull off the upset.

    The Cowboys play similar to Oklahoma Sooners in the big game lately… the important ones. Chookkeeeeeee….

    I hear that they might hire Jason Garrett as the head coach and fire Wade Philips, just to keep Garrett around? Would be a good choice, seeing how Wade Phillips has no playoff wins?

    Comment by Clint Lenard -

  42. Ah….I was at the game. Flew in from CA just to see playoff game. Hurts a lot worse in person and I can only imagine what all of the players and staff were feeling.

    Comment by Joseph Morin -

  43. As a Packer fan I felt great. We get another game at the Frozen Tundra! I hope the Giants get the same blizzard the Seahawks did.

    Comment by carpeting -

  44. WHOA! That was a spectacular game. I feel the Giants are well worth the win and i\’m also confident that they will give a lot of teams a run for their money.

    I think they had the chance to beat the Patriots last time and they are very much capable of doing it again.

    http://www.abesha.wordpress.com

    Comment by Dr. Ethiopia -

  45. Sure losing in the playoffs sucks,but being a life long Giants fan it didn\’t suck for me.Saw you on Bill Maher next time tell Tony Snow to shut up. You were making some important points on the voting machines and Snow and Maher talked right over your points.

    Comment by dan -

  46. its great mark..

    go man go ..

    thanx

    Comment by ShenYurt -

  47. As a Cubs fan I know exactly what this feels like. Although, I still hold out faith that – you, Mr. Mark Cuban will save the sports world as we know it and bring a championship to the North Side of Chicago.

    …Please buy the team!!!!

    Comment by Paul Bowser -

  48. As a Cowboys fan, it was terribly hard to watch the closing seconds, after having such a great season. I anticipate Jones adding depth to the offensive line, improving the secondary, and showing the world next season, that the season the Pats had this year was nothing special.

    Comment by Shawn -

  49. Nice post Mark. I can appreciate what you are feeling to a certain extent but of course most of us relate more to the fan. As a fan of most sports, it feels like part of your life just went KABLAM. In the end, you\’re right – life goes on, looking for the edge.

    best,
    -jim

    Comment by Jim Dorey -

  50. I was at the game and watched you walk off the floor against the Warriors last year and was surprised at your composure. You were getting it from all sides and you just kept walking. That, after displaying some over the top emotion during the game, was something that stood out in my mind. It\’s tough to lose, but it makes winning that much better.

    Comment by Bob Wegener -

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